well ... u all should know that i retain .... then now i is like a zombie lo ... my mum's aunt told me to be confidence that i can do it but i really wanna to tell her that the only that i m confident at is i m not confident in anything ...
also , i think my mum dunno how to talk to me lo ... the way she speak really sound like she felt really embarrassed that i hav retain .. and wish i did not exist lo ....
i also wanna to die lo ... but wat will happen to my bro who will take care of him ?
i dun want to limit his help because jus that he cannot survived on his own so i need to help him i cannot jus stop his life because i cannot live ... i need to help him .... i can control my life but not others ... so once he is gone i will be going also ... now i think nothing is meaningful to me except my bro lo ...
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